an open letter to the inventor of bread
hey. thanks
Nomitkon, Tajikistan — I’d never seen a bread eating cat before. But this cat loved bread. He would practically sit down at the table and wait to be served. The owners would throw him a few pieces and then throw him out of the house, but he would soon sneak back in and continue looking longingly at the loaves.
bread cat
looking longingly at the loaves
Go to Starbucks. Order coffee for “Prisoner 24601”
When they call out your order, jump up and yell “My name is Jean Valjean!”
And if the barista replies with “AND I’M JAVERT,” you tip that motherfucker so hard
you tip them right over the edge of a bridge
you fucking didn’t
oh my god.
only do this if you also get a bagel.