Glenn Beck: Anything that I said in jokes, no. Ask Jon Stewart. Ask The Simpsons.

Jon Stewart: I think Glenn Beck thinks I’m a cartoon character. Glenn, here’s the thing, my man! You don’t have to tell Meredith Viera to ask me. Ask me yourself. Once again, my brother, you, my friend, and I… Hold on.



…I thought we were changing that title. It’s just. But my message is the same. Glenn Beck, I would like you to be on our show, by which I mean appear on our show, so you can get some things off your chest. You can, uh –



No, no! That’s not what I want to. I’d like to… just lose the lower third. I’ll sweeten the deal, brother man. I’ve got a present for you. I know you love the teachin’.



It’s one of them five-pronged colored chalk things. You could use it on your board to do all the stuff you do. Imagine, you could get five people connected to George Soros. Tell me if you’ll come on because I do have to give this back to my daughter.

Uh, but seriously! I’ll ask you some questions, we’ll get to know each other on my new segment –



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