date a girl who treats you the same way she treats books
I’ll critique you continuously and won’t be too bothered if I break your spine
And then I’ll review your performance on several social media sites and ask for feedback.
I’ll also insert rectangular metal and paper objects into your body whenever I need a break from you, and store you on a shelf in my house
I’ll be done with you in less than a week and move on immediately.
If you piss me off, I’ll either throw you across the room or just ignore you for several months. Probably the cats will chew on you.
I’ll throw you in a bag and forget you’re there for a month, and once I do remember again, I’ll write sarcastic comments on post its and stick them to you.