aries Sometimes I get emotional over fonts

taurus You basically can say anything to someone on an email or text as long as you put LOL at the end

gemini I love me

cancer I specifically ordered persian rugs with cherub imagery!!! What do I have to do to get a simple persian rug with cherub imagery uuuuugh

leo I love everybody... only thing I don't like is taxes.. me and taxes gone fight

virgo sometimes I push the door close button on people running towards the elevator. I just need my own elevator sometimes, my 7 floor sanctuary

libra We lookin' crazy fresh where's paparazzi when you need them

scorpio I could never do stand up cause I tell jokes better when I'm sitting

sagittarius I think it’s only ok for a dude to call you baby if they’re a Hollywood agent and you kind of cringe when they say it or if yall hooping

capricorn French fries are the Devil

aquarius So Nirvana can have a naked human being on the cover but I can't have a PAINTING of a monster with no arms and a polka dot tail and wings

pisces I hate when I’m on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle