In fact, I fear I am a jack-of-all-trades.

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
cath-sith exile-wrath
hello-kitty-senpai

There is a specific and terrifying difference between “never were” monsters and “are not anymore” monsters

“The thing that was not a deer” implies a creature which mimics a deer but imperfectly and the details which are wrong are what makes it terrifying

“The thing that was not a deer anymore” on the other hand implies a thing that USED to be a deer before it was somehow mutated, possessed, parasitically controlled or reanimated improperly and what makes THAT terrifying is the details that are still right and recognizable poking out of all the wrong and horrible malformations.

hello-kitty-senpai

hey I totally fucked up and forgot the 3rd type, which is “Is Not Anymore And Maybe Never Was” monsters

“The thing which was no longer a deer and maybe never was” implies a creature that, at first glance, completely appears to be a deer, but over time degrades very slowly until you realize (probably too late) that it is not a deer anymore, and had you seen it in this state first, you wouldn’t have recognized it as a deer at all, and there’s a decent chance that it was never actually a deer to begin with but only a very good mimic, and what makes this one scary is the slow change from everything being right to everything being wrong, happening slowly enough that you don’t even notice it until its too late, as well as the fact that something now so clearly not a deer could have fooled you to begin with.

katekarl

And the fourth type, which is, “I dunno, but it sure ain’t a deer.” Which implies complete confusion about what the creature could be, to the point that even a person as comfortable in this world as someone who would use the word ain’t unironically is uncertain, which should horrify you to the deepest depths of your soul.

sad-comet

i once sent @esselley a list of her hottest kageyamas and she commissioned me to draw them LMAO this is kinda dating sim-ish because we’re horny but that’s the way the cookie crumbles!

fanfics/AUs i referenced in order:

i needed to pee so bad so i had to finish this post in like 2 seconds haikyuu!! hq!! kagehina kageyama tobio hinata shouyou essies writing is too good for this world
angelsaves seananmcguire
lieutenant-sapphic

so the fact remains that jeff goldblum played the grandmaster with absolute peak perfection and absolutely no other mcu performance can top that, which is just a fact, but it means that either jeff goldblum has this fantastically nuanced understanding of this character who is incredibly ancient and powerful but still ultimately a silly hedonist OR he just rolled up to thor ragnarok like ‘i’m jeff goldblum and i’m gonna be playing jeff goldblum’ and fuckin nailed it

lieutenant-sapphic

the fact that they actually wrote the role for him makes it even better because that means the execs were like “who should play one of the most powerful characters we’ve ever had, the ruler of an entire planet, who is more ancient and knowledgable than a literal god, and decides the lives and deaths of countless individuals” and the conclusion they came to was “jeff goldblum in a sparkly gold bathrobe”